Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, Kinky, Masturbate, Orgasms, Pussy, Rant, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, Sex toy review, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Inflatable hot seat review 

Oh my word! This is prob the best way to get off for someone like me who has a slight sex addiction that she is controlling without the help from doctors as counselors. 

The hot seat is inflatable- so you just blow it up- make sure you have two double A batteries and then go to town on it. I haven’t been with a man for quite a few months now- but with this toy— I don’t think I’ll need to waste my time with losers just to get fucked. 

I can get myself off as I ride the black dick- and not have to worry whether it’s clean or has diseases. I don’t even have to make small talk or listen to it rant about their jobs and the military which I don’t care about. 

I’ve been patiently waiting for this for the past week and for it this morning! Hooked it up grabbed some lube and went to town on it. It’s a bit loud though so if your trying to be discreet—- blast some music. It vibrates as it’s inside your pussy and it makes for an extra orgasm. I fingered my pussy as it vibrated inside me and it was incredible. I came within a few minutes. I honestly feel my pussy still vibrating, and pulsating as if in still riding the attached dildo. 

I need a cigarette now and feel like I can just relax and maybe take a nice nap. I’m so glad I made this purchase and know that my weekends when I’m alone and longing for some orgasms—- I’ll use this instead of a guy who I can’t stand. 

They have these hot seats on the website Groupon and it was discounted- I paid $31 for an instant orgasm. Ladies or even guys check this out. 


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Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, BDSM, Clit kisser, Dating, erotica, Kinky, Lesbian, Masturbate, Oral sex, Orgasms, Porn, Porn star, Pussy, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, Single, Submissive, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Users, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Weekend meetup

So it’s getting close to that time again-

Bill yum will be in town next weekend and I’m so excited about it

I haven’t had sex in a while and have been so horny

I text him last night to see if he’s getting a hotel when he comes and he said most likely

Not sure if he will or not but either way I’m gonna fuCk him

Whether it’s in the back of his car or just fucking on the side of a dark back road 

I need to fill my want and need 

Tank isn’t doing that for me since we are waiting to have sex

Which is cool but a girl needs a little more than just dry humping and sucking a dick

So I plan on Saturday to be wild as always when I’m with Bill yum

His huge black dick will penetrate my tight pussy and feed this need I’ve had for quite some time 

It might seem as though I am just using him for sex— but am I wrong? 

Men do it all the time- why can’t women. 

Fuck it I’m gonna do what I want anyway no matter what people say or think even if they think it’s wrong.

Tank update:

So I’m still talking/texting Tank since the last time we went out on a date and he supposedly would start coming up to see me more- now to see if he’s truthful about that And actually comes. 

I just feel like sometimes guys are all talk- 

I won’t believe him until I actually see it happen

I’m feeling a bit strange about Tank and thinking maybe he’s not that experienced sexually since he doesn’t wanna have sex with me yet. His kissing was awkward and it was as if he pushing his whole mouth on my mouth and the tongue doesn’t move in sync with mine- I cannot explain it but he’s a terrible kisser and I feel like I’m suffocating when he kisses me- doesn’t give me those feels like other guys do when we kiss so I’m wondering if I’m honestly attracted to him or not and wondering if I’m wasting my time. I had to tell him on Saturday to kiss a certain way not sure if I crushed his male ego but I don’t give a fuck I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Tank is the kind of guy who seems like he hasn’t been with a woman in a long time which I guess is a good thing but there’s no thrill there there’s no freakiness and experimentation like I want. 

When talking about sexual fantasies- I mention a threesone with a guy and girl and his eyes bulged out of his head- shocked. 

I mention how I might be into whips and choking and he looked so scared. Not sure if we have the same sexual chemistry and not sure how long this will last because of it- although I am trying hard to get to know him and with time maybe he would reveal a freaky side to him. He did however say he likes to be dominated by a woman and it turns him on. But I like to switch it up I wanna be dominated but also dominate so wondering if he could do that for me. He also seems to really have a foot fetish and shower fetish. Every time I see him he mentions he wants to wash my body down and massage my feet- I’m like umm okay sure you can- but I haven’t allowed him to do it yet cause I told him I can’t just shower with him without wanting to fuck him right after- I said it’s too much of a tease to do that. So basically all we do right now is cuddle, dry hump, I suck his dick and I finger myself till I fall asleep. Guess I’ll see how much longer this goes on. 

Tank also said he’ll eat pussy when we get more intimate 

Like how much more intimate do we need to get? 

I suck your dick but you can’t return the favor? 

This kinda irritates me- so not sure where this thing with Tank will go. The guys I choose are selfish as fuck when it comes to eating pussy.

I’m about to get me a female just so my pussy gets licked and some more attention 

Update on Don:

So I text him a dirty meme the other day cause it reminded me of him and the way he lays down the pipe 

He responds and says he wants to meet up

I’m tempted and might just meet with him this Sunday so I can get some action before next weekend 

It feels like forever that I had sex

Since all my dudes are long distance 

So not sure what will happen Sunday but I’ll deff keep my followers posted

Tyrone Update:

Tyrone and I are supposed to hang out sometime this week- but not 100% sure about that since he’s been so busy. 

Solo:

Pleasuring myself is the only way these days.

I’ve been fingering myself a lot these days and watching a lot of pornhub the blacked edition- which I love and it seems to be satisfying me. 

Just don’t know how much longer it will satisfy me until I erupt and want to just fuck everything and anything. 

Stay tuned for more sex stories that I am sure are on their way since I’ve been horny as fuck 

The pussy controls me and I think I’ll let it 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Army, Arousing, Celibacy, Control freak, Dating, Military, Rant, Realistic, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Update- Celibacy No More

so ive been celibate the last three months and was so proud of my streak. i done went and fucked it up by first giving Don head in the back of his car- but i figured its not sex so I was still considered celibate. 

then about a week and a half later i met up with Bill Yum after going ghost on him for months- like every other guy i left alone to figure me and my addiction out.
so apparently he moved to a new house and lives with two other roomates who are guys- which is cool. he says he works all the time and hasnt had time for females and was wondering what happened with me. told him i was fighting some demons and trying to get right with myself, so went ghost. 

he texted me the one day or maybe i texted him cause i was getting the itch i get where i needed some dick- so he invited me up his place- whih is two hours away- i agreed and said id come up to spend the night.
felt good to see his face, the past was behind us with the whole cheating thing i forgave him, he apologized. 

i told him how i felt and we made up. so here we are talking catching up and watching movies- when for the first time in a long while i didnt wanna just jump his bones.

 i actually enjoyed our conversation and our flirting. i missed my hands inside his. it felt great to be there with him. so we watched some movies, then all of a sudden he started to finger me on the couch. oh my lawd, it felt incredible! then he pulled off my shorts and stuck his massive black cock in my wet pussy. i screamed cause that was the first time in three months i had a dick in me. i moaned and moaned as he thrust into me. i was going wild as he flipped me over and i flipped back. we kissed and he kissed my body all over. i love the way he feels on top of me. echoes of my screams go throughout the house as i start to cream on his black couch that he shares with his roomates. he thrusts one last thrust and my whole body is throbbing- and i cum everywhere. we finished at the same time.
we continue to watch the movies and eat and just have a couple drinks. then one of his roomates come in from out partying and hes drunk. he falls asleep on the recliner next to us as we continue to watch the movie. by this time im getting sleepy and wanna just go lay in his bed. so i start rubbing on his cock right on the couch next to his roomate. trying to hint to him- im ready to go another round. then i tell him im going downstairs to lay in bed.
i head downstairs and put on my lingerie that i brought to look sexy for him. its a really cute see through pink set i wore in a recent boudoir photo shoot i did. i felt so sexy in it and couldnt wait for him to see me in it.
so i adjust myself and turn on some music. he peeks his head in and sees me wearing it- and says i look sexy, as he grabs my butt. definetly the reaction i wanted from him.
he tells me he will be back in. so i make myself comfortable on his bed. his bed was very soft. fighting sleep, so we could get one or two more rounds in before we actually have to sleep.
he comes in and we talk, then i start to go down on him. placing my wet warm mouth on his dick- and i hear him moan in pleasure.
then i hop on top and start riding him, thrusting back and forth and going wild since its been a while since i fucked a guy. he grips me up and pulls my hair, then spanks me. then i pull out my vibrator which he uses on me as hes fingering me- omg it felt so good. he was telling me to be quiet but i couldnt help myself. im sure his roomates heard everything… but honestly it turned me on more knowing they could hear. We decided we are gonna do another long distance thing- so gonna see where it goes. I will see his this weekend when he’s in town- 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, Celibacy, Control freak, Dating, Friendship, Life lessons, Love, Missing him, Realistic, Sex, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

He’s back in my life 

So…. ….

I’ve decided to let Don back into my life…..

I remembered all the good things that he helped me do and encouraged me to do. 

The main reason I let him back in was due to something my friend Tyrone was saying about the guys I like and telling me about how people are set in your life for certain reasons. He also said be with someone who wants to better you and wants you to better you. 

I always had a connection with Don since the first day we started to talk on Facebook and through the phone. 

Then we had an even bigger connection when we met for the first time in person. 

When we hung out tonight- all these warm fuzzy feelings came back to me-I think I may have loved him at one point- and it feels like those feelings were coming back- maybe they never left. 

I missed looking at his mysterious brown eyes and looking at his sexy lips as he talked to me. I really missed our conversations. 

We haven’t seen each other in three months and when we met up- we got right into our conversation and chatted for a while. 

I so wanted to kiss him.

And my heart felt full when in his presence 

It’s a crazy kind of feeling I have for him and when I am around him

I’m wondering if I’m falling all over again or if I fell for him before but always pushed away the feelings of it cause I was scared and made up every excuse to avoid being with him- like I always do. 

So we talked about going the relationship route in 2017- and I said it sounds great! I jokingly said I have to work on me this final week and learn to just trust and not worry so much. 

I also thought when in relationships you jump all in- but he said to go slow and go into it gradually.

 I really wanna do this and I wanna have him in my life. 

I know I have him in my life now but on a friend level- but I think I’m ready to have him on the bf level. I guess time will tell and I’ll see what my next move is.

Oh I told him about my sex addiction tonight and how I’m working on me and being celibate for a while until the guy I’m with is worthy of my good good. He said he respects it and won’t pressure me. He said whenever I’m ready for sex, is when it will happen. He also learned that I love being spanked and choked in the bedroom and I’m surprised he wasn’t to taken back by any of it. He actually told me he thought I had an addiction so he sorta already knew. 

I’m ready to find and hold on to love in 2017- it’s my time to be happy. 

Posted in Celibacy, Counseling, Life lessons, Masturbate, Rant, Realistic, Sex, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Celibate

So I guess my blog should no longer be sierras sexcapades since I’ve decided to go down the path of celibacy. I had to stop this addiction which would’ve had me on the path of self destruction. And I’m doing a great job. I feel like I’m really learning more about myself and growing a lot on this journey of self control. I haven’t gone to sex addiction meetings yet but am debating if I should go sit in on one or not just for the extra support. I am proud of myself and decided it’s best for Don to stay out of my life completely since he doesn’t do anything positive in my life- he wouldn’t be a positive person to have around and my contact with him would only make the celibacy vow I’ve decided to take fall through. 

So I feel invincible now that I gained some confidence and realized that I am worth more. I don’t have to open my legs up and just hook up with guys to satisfy me. I am actually at a point where I’m okay sitting in the house and using my new vibrators I just bought. 

I wanna save myself for someone worth it. Who respects me and understands who I am and what I may be struggling with but still accepts me the way I am. 

I will continue on this path and see what happens. I’m at the point in my recovery where I know I can do it and I will do it- for me 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Counseling, Dating, Life lessons, Orgasms, Porn, Rant, Realistic, Sex, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Time

So I’ve been doing great

These last almost 3 months I have gone without sex

That’s sorta a new record for me and I’m proud of it

It’s hard not to just text or call up him or him to break me off 

And I could’ve really taken Enrique up on his offer to do the FWB thing

So I’m feeling very proud of myself right now

I guess with some self control and understanding I am worth more than just a busted nut I can make things happen for myself and grow as a person who is recovering from what I think is an addiction 

I feel like I can do anything at this point and really have confidence in what I can do professionally without having to think that my addiction will somehow get in the way of it as ruin it… like it once had at one point.

With time and a lot of restraint 

And therapy it is helping 

Although I miss the company of certain guys… especially Monster since we had a little history I know starting things up with him only adds to my addiction and makes me do things and get on a road where it will lead to me being reckless and back to my old habits 

I didn’t like the route I was going down and had actually thought about selling sex for money- and once I got to that point I knew I had to end this. 

I took money from a guy I fucked a few years ago and he expected Sex or a blow job or whatever even though I was just borrowing the money and I felt dirty after and I didn’t even do anything sexual with him. So I know I guess I’m good where I am right now- I have a conscience and it does speak to me. 

So basically the reason of my rant is to tell you guys I’m working hard at this and am doing well. Each day is more difficult then the next not to just flip the switch and say fuck it I wanna do that threesome or have monster fuck my brains out… but I will take it a day at a time and make it happen. 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Army, Arousing, Life lessons, Loss, Military, Missing him, Rant, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Vibrators

So I just ordered a ton of sex toys for myself so I can get myself nice and wet since I haven’t had a guy to help me out in that department. 

If I finally decide to have sex 

I’m going to be so tight down there since I haven’t been fucking anyone

So the next time I am with a man it might actually feel different

Maybe I should every so often take a break from guys and sex so I can experience what it feels like to not have a dick in between my legs and keep my pussy tighter.

I’m hoping these vibrators do their job and satisfy me

I know it isn’t a guy and a real life dick but I need to curb my appetite and I feel like this is one way I could do it.

Monster is coming to town in two weeks and I think I’m going to plan to meet up with him.

I miss him in my life. 

I know he’s probably wrong for me on so many levels

But I’m usually attracted to the guys who are in fact wrong for me. 

Update on brothers friend Bob… so apparently he did go to rehab.. so his facebook post states and his friends are concerned… but he’s back to his old ways… in the bar drinking away his sorrows or whatever he drinks away for. Guess he didn’t care about me like I did for him. Guess I was just someone for him to do at the time- cause he did not text, call or message me through social media to let me know he’s back home and done with rehab. Oh well guys will be guys. And he is a douchebag because I would’ve made an awesome girlfriend to him. Hey we win some, we lose some. On to the next is what I always say! 
So I’ve been in contact with monster for the past month and he’s gonna be getting a hotel room when he comes to visit. 

He’s close with one of my older brothers and is going to my brothers for a party- so I might just go to my brothers that day looking irresistible. I plan to do some dirty things with him in my brothers bathroom, in monsters car, and hopefully all night in the hotel room. 

Glad I’m saving my pussy for someone I actually care and have feelings for- not just for a random hookup. 

Making some progress and now I know how to control myself, and I know I didn’t die going these last two-three months without actual penetration- so I will be alright. 

I am growing and improving with each day. Each day I am getting stronger and stronger in this fight.

Addiction will not overcome me.

I will not fall

I am stronger then I think