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Weekend meetup

So it’s getting close to that time again-

Bill yum will be in town next weekend and I’m so excited about it

I haven’t had sex in a while and have been so horny

I text him last night to see if he’s getting a hotel when he comes and he said most likely

Not sure if he will or not but either way I’m gonna fuCk him

Whether it’s in the back of his car or just fucking on the side of a dark back road 

I need to fill my want and need 

Tank isn’t doing that for me since we are waiting to have sex

Which is cool but a girl needs a little more than just dry humping and sucking a dick

So I plan on Saturday to be wild as always when I’m with Bill yum

His huge black dick will penetrate my tight pussy and feed this need I’ve had for quite some time 

It might seem as though I am just using him for sex— but am I wrong? 

Men do it all the time- why can’t women. 

Fuck it I’m gonna do what I want anyway no matter what people say or think even if they think it’s wrong.

Tank update:

So I’m still talking/texting Tank since the last time we went out on a date and he supposedly would start coming up to see me more- now to see if he’s truthful about that And actually comes. 

I just feel like sometimes guys are all talk- 

I won’t believe him until I actually see it happen

I’m feeling a bit strange about Tank and thinking maybe he’s not that experienced sexually since he doesn’t wanna have sex with me yet. His kissing was awkward and it was as if he pushing his whole mouth on my mouth and the tongue doesn’t move in sync with mine- I cannot explain it but he’s a terrible kisser and I feel like I’m suffocating when he kisses me- doesn’t give me those feels like other guys do when we kiss so I’m wondering if I’m honestly attracted to him or not and wondering if I’m wasting my time. I had to tell him on Saturday to kiss a certain way not sure if I crushed his male ego but I don’t give a fuck I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Tank is the kind of guy who seems like he hasn’t been with a woman in a long time which I guess is a good thing but there’s no thrill there there’s no freakiness and experimentation like I want. 

When talking about sexual fantasies- I mention a threesone with a guy and girl and his eyes bulged out of his head- shocked. 

I mention how I might be into whips and choking and he looked so scared. Not sure if we have the same sexual chemistry and not sure how long this will last because of it- although I am trying hard to get to know him and with time maybe he would reveal a freaky side to him. He did however say he likes to be dominated by a woman and it turns him on. But I like to switch it up I wanna be dominated but also dominate so wondering if he could do that for me. He also seems to really have a foot fetish and shower fetish. Every time I see him he mentions he wants to wash my body down and massage my feet- I’m like umm okay sure you can- but I haven’t allowed him to do it yet cause I told him I can’t just shower with him without wanting to fuck him right after- I said it’s too much of a tease to do that. So basically all we do right now is cuddle, dry hump, I suck his dick and I finger myself till I fall asleep. Guess I’ll see how much longer this goes on. 

Tank also said he’ll eat pussy when we get more intimate 

Like how much more intimate do we need to get? 

I suck your dick but you can’t return the favor? 

This kinda irritates me- so not sure where this thing with Tank will go. The guys I choose are selfish as fuck when it comes to eating pussy.

I’m about to get me a female just so my pussy gets licked and some more attention 

Update on Don:

So I text him a dirty meme the other day cause it reminded me of him and the way he lays down the pipe 

He responds and says he wants to meet up

I’m tempted and might just meet with him this Sunday so I can get some action before next weekend 

It feels like forever that I had sex

Since all my dudes are long distance 

So not sure what will happen Sunday but I’ll deff keep my followers posted

Tyrone Update:

Tyrone and I are supposed to hang out sometime this week- but not 100% sure about that since he’s been so busy. 

Solo:

Pleasuring myself is the only way these days.

I’ve been fingering myself a lot these days and watching a lot of pornhub the blacked edition- which I love and it seems to be satisfying me. 

Just don’t know how much longer it will satisfy me until I erupt and want to just fuck everything and anything. 

Stay tuned for more sex stories that I am sure are on their way since I’ve been horny as fuck 

The pussy controls me and I think I’ll let it 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Counseling, Dating, Life lessons, Orgasms, Porn, Rant, Realistic, Sex, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Time

So I’ve been doing great

These last almost 3 months I have gone without sex

That’s sorta a new record for me and I’m proud of it

It’s hard not to just text or call up him or him to break me off 

And I could’ve really taken Enrique up on his offer to do the FWB thing

So I’m feeling very proud of myself right now

I guess with some self control and understanding I am worth more than just a busted nut I can make things happen for myself and grow as a person who is recovering from what I think is an addiction 

I feel like I can do anything at this point and really have confidence in what I can do professionally without having to think that my addiction will somehow get in the way of it as ruin it… like it once had at one point.

With time and a lot of restraint 

And therapy it is helping 

Although I miss the company of certain guys… especially Monster since we had a little history I know starting things up with him only adds to my addiction and makes me do things and get on a road where it will lead to me being reckless and back to my old habits 

I didn’t like the route I was going down and had actually thought about selling sex for money- and once I got to that point I knew I had to end this. 

I took money from a guy I fucked a few years ago and he expected Sex or a blow job or whatever even though I was just borrowing the money and I felt dirty after and I didn’t even do anything sexual with him. So I know I guess I’m good where I am right now- I have a conscience and it does speak to me. 

So basically the reason of my rant is to tell you guys I’m working hard at this and am doing well. Each day is more difficult then the next not to just flip the switch and say fuck it I wanna do that threesome or have monster fuck my brains out… but I will take it a day at a time and make it happen. 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Army, Arousing, erotica, Kinky, Masturbate, Military, Orgasms, Porn, Realistic, Sex, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Still horny 

So I lay here in bed and recall my shenanigans over the weekend and think to myself damn I am still horny as fuck. Although I had my pussy eaten like no tomorrow- which rarely happens when I mess with black guys- (yea Friday guy was a white guy) I still feel horny as hell. 

Oral is fine and all and great cause I never get it- black guys don’t do that for some reason- I will never know why- but I am fucking horny and feel so aroused like I really wish I had a dude to just call up and ask to come over. All my men are too many miles away and I can’t even just go and see them. This long distance shit is for the birds. The army lifestyle is for the birds too. 

Really contemplating banging the 22 year old and his new friend that I just got introduced to.

It’s going against my initial rule that 22 is way too young for me- but really what is age? 

If it’s only sex- Friday guy was shockingly the oldest guy I’ve been with ever and he was past my rule of too old- so why should I not break my top young rule?

 They are adult age- they are just about ten years younger then me- 

You with think 22 would have more stamina

More energy

Be able to go many more rounds 

Damn I’m talking myself into it just getting aroused think about the 22 year old guys I want as my next conquests 

Not sure what my next move is…. but will keep my loyal followers updated. 

First I need to lay the ground work- texting and sexting then I’ll get my way… get their dicks in my mouth and pussy. 

Btw both of these 22 year olds are army which makes it even sexier 

Since I have a thing for military guys 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Army, BDSM, Kinky, Masturbate, Military, Orgasms, Porn, Realistic, Sex toy, Submissive, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

New Fuck Buddy to play with

So planning to meet a possible new fuck buddy 

He claims he likes to be dominant and he’s into doing freaky things 

Now to test him out and see what he’s like

Needed some more dudes in my life

Staying dry as fuck really ain’t cool

Dating ain’t for me right now 

So I wanna explore what is out there 

Maybe having new guys added to my occasional fucks will teach me new ways of enjoying sex 

And my body 

So hoping Saturday gets here quickly cause I want to have this new guys dick in my mouth

Might be a possible three way also

With two younger guys…. 

I was told to bring my sex toys and we will use them 

He also wants to fuck me in the ass

Which I’m sorta opposed to in a way but if we fuck around for a while anal will be worth it

For some reason anal to me is sacred not every guy can poke me there

Which should probably be the way with my pussy but oh well 

So going to get ass fucked and pussy fucked hopefully at the same time— 

Be a first for me-

The other three ways consisted of me being face fucked And pounded in my pussy

Kinda excited about the idea of double penetration in that way as if it’s a porno 

Really hot to think about

Pussy is pulsating a bit just imagining what will happen… 

Probably opening up Pandora’s box adding these other guys to the mix and adding to the extreme needs and wants of my addiction but I guess I gotta get it out the way before I get help 

And it’s gone forever 

I will update you guys on what happens 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Army, Arousing, erotica, Kinky, Military, Orgasms, Realistic, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Ready to Fuck

So I deleted the numbers of the guys I said I would but then I receive an email today from Monster with his new number in it! 

It’s a sign to keep his big black dick around for a little bit longer

I know I won’t see him until prob December but that’s okay

He can be my occasional guy I fuck until I find me some new play things to play with

I thought I turned over a new leaf since I haven’t had sex in about a month or so but I’m horny as ever and want to just fuck

I have a date tomorrow with an old boss I used to work for

I kinda always had a thing for him even though he’s not that attractive but I like his personality I guess

So I guess we will see how the night goes- I know alcohol will be involved so I wonder if we will fuck or not-

I’m planning on hanging out with 22, on Saturday so if Friday doesn’t work out- which I think I won’t fuck Friday guy- I’ll deff be having some fun with 22. 

He’s the forbidden fruit

The 22 year old guy I was hesitant about fucking in one of my orevious posts

He says he loves to lick pussy and I won’t object to that

Guess I’ll see whether or not that’s the truth

I miss Tyrone though we text pretty much everyday and most often about naughty things we want to do to each other but it sucks cause I want him now 

Debating if I wanna make the hour and a half drive up to see him just to fuck him and have him fuck my brains out for one night to go back home and not see him for another week or weeks more

I don’t usually get attached to dudes but once I start not having sex anymore it makes me miss the dicks I had in between my legs and in my mouth

I talked to Monster the other day and he said he’s going to try and see me one of these days- but his work schedule is terrible- why do I always go for the guys who live far away or who are set on active duty with the military 

Maybe it’s a sign to stop fucking military guys 

I would’ve thought my ex husband was a sign to stop dating military guys

But I like what I like 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, BDSM, Chicks with dicks, erotica, Hardcore, Kinky, Masturbate, Orgasms, Porn, Porn star, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized

Webcam girl 

So I decided I should start making money off of my sexy photos and even thinking bout recording a film with a couple guys I talk to. I need to make bank and I think it would help me in feeding my addiction. So currently searching sites and seeing about starting a webcam, to go along with my blogs. 

Hoping I can receive followers and can actually make money. 

I’ll update you guys on how it goes waiting on approval from one site and continuing to search other sites to find the best one 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, Counseling, Dating, Realistic, Sex, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Struggle. Fighting the demons. 

So I’m in a constant struggle with myself to fight these demons that are pulling me every which way.

I know I should put and end to this addiction and take care of me. 

But then again I also think okay just a few more times

A few more dicks

Or I should at least get that three way with a girl I always wanted out of the way then get the help I think I need

The struggle is real

The battle is hard

And I wonder what my decision will be

Should I say fuck it as long as I’m not hurting anyone or myself to just be this undercover addict 

Or should I get the help aNd maybe they could help me understand how to be normal and how to have a meaningful relationship with a guy and not base it off of sex all the time

So I think back to what Tyrone has said to me

He said he knew I was an addict from the way I couldn’t just cuddle with him

I was literally jumping and grinding on him as we cuddled and laid together

And I thought back to every other time I lay with a guy

And I remember I had the same results

Why the fuck can’t I just lay and cuddle with a guy without grinding on them

Pushing my ass into them or trying to hump them? 

To me cuddling was weird enough 

Guess cause I’m not used to it 

But it’s frustrating to know that someone can pinpoint that I have a problem and am unable to be like a normal woman and just relax and cuddle with a guy without throwing myself at them and wanted to get right to the sex. 

So here is my continuing battle and everyday will bring the struggle. 

I will fight it each day and see if I can get stronger or fall weak to it