Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, Kinky, Masturbate, Orgasms, Pussy, Rant, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, Sex toy review, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Inflatable hot seat review 

Oh my word! This is prob the best way to get off for someone like me who has a slight sex addiction that she is controlling without the help from doctors as counselors. 

The hot seat is inflatable- so you just blow it up- make sure you have two double A batteries and then go to town on it. I haven’t been with a man for quite a few months now- but with this toy— I don’t think I’ll need to waste my time with losers just to get fucked. 

I can get myself off as I ride the black dick- and not have to worry whether it’s clean or has diseases. I don’t even have to make small talk or listen to it rant about their jobs and the military which I don’t care about. 

I’ve been patiently waiting for this for the past week and for it this morning! Hooked it up grabbed some lube and went to town on it. It’s a bit loud though so if your trying to be discreet—- blast some music. It vibrates as it’s inside your pussy and it makes for an extra orgasm. I fingered my pussy as it vibrated inside me and it was incredible. I came within a few minutes. I honestly feel my pussy still vibrating, and pulsating as if in still riding the attached dildo. 

I need a cigarette now and feel like I can just relax and maybe take a nice nap. I’m so glad I made this purchase and know that my weekends when I’m alone and longing for some orgasms—- I’ll use this instead of a guy who I can’t stand. 

They have these hot seats on the website Groupon and it was discounted- I paid $31 for an instant orgasm. Ladies or even guys check this out. 


Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Arousing, BDSM, Clit kisser, Dating, erotica, Kinky, Lesbian, Masturbate, Oral sex, Orgasms, Porn, Porn star, Pussy, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, Single, Submissive, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Users, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Weekend meetup

So it’s getting close to that time again-

Bill yum will be in town next weekend and I’m so excited about it

I haven’t had sex in a while and have been so horny

I text him last night to see if he’s getting a hotel when he comes and he said most likely

Not sure if he will or not but either way I’m gonna fuCk him

Whether it’s in the back of his car or just fucking on the side of a dark back road 

I need to fill my want and need 

Tank isn’t doing that for me since we are waiting to have sex

Which is cool but a girl needs a little more than just dry humping and sucking a dick

So I plan on Saturday to be wild as always when I’m with Bill yum

His huge black dick will penetrate my tight pussy and feed this need I’ve had for quite some time 

It might seem as though I am just using him for sex— but am I wrong? 

Men do it all the time- why can’t women. 

Fuck it I’m gonna do what I want anyway no matter what people say or think even if they think it’s wrong.

Tank update:

So I’m still talking/texting Tank since the last time we went out on a date and he supposedly would start coming up to see me more- now to see if he’s truthful about that And actually comes. 

I just feel like sometimes guys are all talk- 

I won’t believe him until I actually see it happen

I’m feeling a bit strange about Tank and thinking maybe he’s not that experienced sexually since he doesn’t wanna have sex with me yet. His kissing was awkward and it was as if he pushing his whole mouth on my mouth and the tongue doesn’t move in sync with mine- I cannot explain it but he’s a terrible kisser and I feel like I’m suffocating when he kisses me- doesn’t give me those feels like other guys do when we kiss so I’m wondering if I’m honestly attracted to him or not and wondering if I’m wasting my time. I had to tell him on Saturday to kiss a certain way not sure if I crushed his male ego but I don’t give a fuck I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Tank is the kind of guy who seems like he hasn’t been with a woman in a long time which I guess is a good thing but there’s no thrill there there’s no freakiness and experimentation like I want. 

When talking about sexual fantasies- I mention a threesone with a guy and girl and his eyes bulged out of his head- shocked. 

I mention how I might be into whips and choking and he looked so scared. Not sure if we have the same sexual chemistry and not sure how long this will last because of it- although I am trying hard to get to know him and with time maybe he would reveal a freaky side to him. He did however say he likes to be dominated by a woman and it turns him on. But I like to switch it up I wanna be dominated but also dominate so wondering if he could do that for me. He also seems to really have a foot fetish and shower fetish. Every time I see him he mentions he wants to wash my body down and massage my feet- I’m like umm okay sure you can- but I haven’t allowed him to do it yet cause I told him I can’t just shower with him without wanting to fuck him right after- I said it’s too much of a tease to do that. So basically all we do right now is cuddle, dry hump, I suck his dick and I finger myself till I fall asleep. Guess I’ll see how much longer this goes on. 

Tank also said he’ll eat pussy when we get more intimate 

Like how much more intimate do we need to get? 

I suck your dick but you can’t return the favor? 

This kinda irritates me- so not sure where this thing with Tank will go. The guys I choose are selfish as fuck when it comes to eating pussy.

I’m about to get me a female just so my pussy gets licked and some more attention 

Update on Don:

So I text him a dirty meme the other day cause it reminded me of him and the way he lays down the pipe 

He responds and says he wants to meet up

I’m tempted and might just meet with him this Sunday so I can get some action before next weekend 

It feels like forever that I had sex

Since all my dudes are long distance 

So not sure what will happen Sunday but I’ll deff keep my followers posted

Tyrone Update:

Tyrone and I are supposed to hang out sometime this week- but not 100% sure about that since he’s been so busy. 

Solo:

Pleasuring myself is the only way these days.

I’ve been fingering myself a lot these days and watching a lot of pornhub the blacked edition- which I love and it seems to be satisfying me. 

Just don’t know how much longer it will satisfy me until I erupt and want to just fuck everything and anything. 

Stay tuned for more sex stories that I am sure are on their way since I’ve been horny as fuck 

The pussy controls me and I think I’ll let it 

Posted in Advice needed, Army, Arousing, Dating, erotica, Friends with benefits, Friendship, Life lessons, Love, Military, Missing him, Orgasms, Rant, Realistic, Revelation, Sex, Single, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized

Bill yummy 

So Bill yum is still in the picture and he’s my random dating guy- fuck me good- long distance lover guy- he’s still living far away from me and he rarely comes to philly to see me other than when he’s up here for Army weekends.

 He messaged me today and sent me the most arousing sexy photo of himself in a towel that was half covering his body and covered up his male part. 

Oh my lawd it caught me off guard and I was smiling and grinning from ear to ear also blushing. I text him back and tell him how fucking sexy he looks. He says he doesn’t believe me and doesn’t think he’s sexy. Yea right how’s he not know? I wondered to myself. 

So anyway we are supposed to hang out sometime this month I think around St.Pattys day and im looking forward to it-

 I’d really like to spend the night At his house again but not sure when I’d be back up that way- if at all any time soon. 

I know it’s not gonna go anywhere with Bill yum but I guess I’m clinging on to the past- 

idk maybe hoping for a future but not sure what the future holds if there is one for us. 

These long distance things are the most difficult- I feel like even being like 30 mins away from someone is difficult cause you don’t know what they could be doing or who they are seeing. Take the situation with Don- he lives in a different neighborhood then me and I always felt like what is he doing or who is he seeing from the distance between us). 

Or maybe that’s where my trust issues come into play and I just am on guard that any guy I am with is out to lie and cheat on me, so trust is hard for me to have. 

When I think of an ideal boyfriend for me, he’d live in the same city and at least the same neighborhood just so maybe it would put my mind at ease a bit on the whole cheating thing-

 but when you think about it if a guys gonna cheat- he will no matter how close or far he lives from you. 
Just a rant of thoughts. 

Thanks for listening. 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Counseling, Dating, Life lessons, Orgasms, Porn, Rant, Realistic, Sex, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Time

So I’ve been doing great

These last almost 3 months I have gone without sex

That’s sorta a new record for me and I’m proud of it

It’s hard not to just text or call up him or him to break me off 

And I could’ve really taken Enrique up on his offer to do the FWB thing

So I’m feeling very proud of myself right now

I guess with some self control and understanding I am worth more than just a busted nut I can make things happen for myself and grow as a person who is recovering from what I think is an addiction 

I feel like I can do anything at this point and really have confidence in what I can do professionally without having to think that my addiction will somehow get in the way of it as ruin it… like it once had at one point.

With time and a lot of restraint 

And therapy it is helping 

Although I miss the company of certain guys… especially Monster since we had a little history I know starting things up with him only adds to my addiction and makes me do things and get on a road where it will lead to me being reckless and back to my old habits 

I didn’t like the route I was going down and had actually thought about selling sex for money- and once I got to that point I knew I had to end this. 

I took money from a guy I fucked a few years ago and he expected Sex or a blow job or whatever even though I was just borrowing the money and I felt dirty after and I didn’t even do anything sexual with him. So I know I guess I’m good where I am right now- I have a conscience and it does speak to me. 

So basically the reason of my rant is to tell you guys I’m working hard at this and am doing well. Each day is more difficult then the next not to just flip the switch and say fuck it I wanna do that threesome or have monster fuck my brains out… but I will take it a day at a time and make it happen. 

Posted in 3Way, Addiction, sexaddict, Army, Arousing, erotica, Kinky, Masturbate, Military, Orgasms, Porn, Realistic, Sex, Threesome, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Still horny 

So I lay here in bed and recall my shenanigans over the weekend and think to myself damn I am still horny as fuck. Although I had my pussy eaten like no tomorrow- which rarely happens when I mess with black guys- (yea Friday guy was a white guy) I still feel horny as hell. 

Oral is fine and all and great cause I never get it- black guys don’t do that for some reason- I will never know why- but I am fucking horny and feel so aroused like I really wish I had a dude to just call up and ask to come over. All my men are too many miles away and I can’t even just go and see them. This long distance shit is for the birds. The army lifestyle is for the birds too. 

Really contemplating banging the 22 year old and his new friend that I just got introduced to.

It’s going against my initial rule that 22 is way too young for me- but really what is age? 

If it’s only sex- Friday guy was shockingly the oldest guy I’ve been with ever and he was past my rule of too old- so why should I not break my top young rule?

 They are adult age- they are just about ten years younger then me- 

You with think 22 would have more stamina

More energy

Be able to go many more rounds 

Damn I’m talking myself into it just getting aroused think about the 22 year old guys I want as my next conquests 

Not sure what my next move is…. but will keep my loyal followers updated. 

First I need to lay the ground work- texting and sexting then I’ll get my way… get their dicks in my mouth and pussy. 

Btw both of these 22 year olds are army which makes it even sexier 

Since I have a thing for military guys 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Advice needed, Arousing, BDSM, Counseling, erotica, Hardcore, Help, Help wanted, Kinky, Masturbate, Orgasms, Porn, Porn star, Realistic, Sex, Sex toy, Submissive, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Vagina, pussy, penetrating, Vibrator

Pandora’s Box

So I forgot to tell you guys about Friday guys friends that I met. They are big freaks! And it’s kinda funny felt like fate that I was supposed to meet them! 

So we’re chatting it up and the beers and shots we’re going down way to smooth

By the third shot I’m blabbing about sex and how I like to explore and all this other nonsense the sober me wouldn’t say as loudly to people I just met like an hour before

So the girlfriend of Fridays friend marko starts telling me about her submissive lifestyle and how she got her bf marko into it

She told me about different websites to search for doms and how to do this and do that

I was intrigued

And a bit aroused

Very curious

She seemed like a cool chick 

Like she’d be a lot of fun to hang out with again

Then when she left to use the bathroom marko pulls out his phone filled with all these photos of her ass and the bruises and marks on it

He’s so happy to show them off

And I go through and see what she wears 

Collars 

And chains

And really sexy clothing

And there’s all these erotica type photos in his phone

I’m like shocked but aroused and excited for them that you’d never have no idea looking at them they’d be like that

Thy seemed like normal people 

But they were freaks and I liked that they were

Friday guy was getting all red in the face and he looked uncomfortable about his friend showing me the photos

I told him it’s okay

I’m interested and want to learn more

So I exchanged numbers with the girl and I think I’m going to text her one day and ask her about some tips on how to be a submissive

And how to explore this side of me that I am drawn to

They mentioned sex clubs and going there 

And this turned me on

Just wish I had a guy to take me there

I could never go there with Friday guy 

And not even sure Tyrone would be up for that

Wondering if I’m opening up Pandora’s box or some side of me that shouldn’t be opened by being friends with this woman and maybe even joining in on trips to clubs with her

I know that night she was nonstop texting me to go join her and her bf to use their sex swing 

And I know if her bf was a little cuter I would’ve joined but I had no attraction to him whatsoever so that kept me from hanging out with them after the bar. 

So just wondering and asking you- my readers what you think- do you think I should open up this door of new explorations or keep the door closed for whatever reason it’s been closed this entire time for. 

Comment your thoughts please. 

Oh and as for the sex addiction counseling I’m still waiting on a call back- 

Posted in Addiction, sexaddict, Asshole, Judgement, Orgasms, Realistic, True life, real, me,, Uncategorized, Users, Vagina, pussy, penetrating

Feeling annoyed.

So I had a night of drunken oral on Friday night with the guy I didn’t think I’d ever do that with- and my sister in law found out through my drunken stooper and can’t look at me the same again. 

I think to myself damn am I that fucked up? Here I go again doing what I do best- fucking up and fucking around with the wrong guys. Supposedly Friday guy is a married man- well when I talked to him he said he’s separated so who am I to question- if he wants to lie it’s on him. I’m not a home wrecker. 

She looked at me with such disgust

But who is she to pass judgement on me 

She been flirting with this guy for years when we worked at the same job with him back in the day- so I’m wrong that he gave me some oral and it was amazing! 

Who is she to judge, When she has been nothing but a rotten mom for years and years and she has a lot more dirt on her then I actually have on me- 

Hate those types of people who judge others

Like your shit don’t stink. 

Rant over. 

So Friday guy gave the best oral ever- can’t remember the night other than that- but from the bits and pieces I do remember I know the oral was great and I was soaked to the bone. I had way to much to drink and ended up passing out on him- no sex with him- no penetration for me- but maybe that’s a good thing. 

I’m waiting on Tyrone to come back to town and bang me out- maybe spank and choke me and punish me a little.